2016 has been one roller-coaster ride – thrilling and terrifying at the same time!
Favorite couples broke up, star kids were born, leading ladies became global stars, the sultans of the world made some inappropriate comments, badshahs made us want to become a fan of our zindagi and perfection created quite the dangal! While we made huge progress by discussing important issues through movies (drug abuse, sexual abuse, woman empowerment) and winning fights to watch them on the big screen (Remember Udta Punjab and the case of Pahlaj Nihalani?), Bollywood still succumbed to objectifying women and making really uncool jokes (Kya Kool Hai Hum 3? Really? Mastizaade? REALLY?). Kareena Kapoor Khan redefined maternity fashion like a boss but a lot of our favorite stars made epic Bollywood blunders. Ram Gopal Varma and KRK continued being offensive while the world tore itself apart one tragedy at a time!
2016 gave us some incredible movies and spectacular memories and let’s hope 2017 does better!
Here are 10 things that we are looking forward to this year!
Pahlaj Nilhani needs to take a chill pill
This guy really needs to calm down. How many scenes did he cut last year because it did not match his unrealistic sanskari thinking? Mr. Nihalani, humans kiss and have sex by the way! It’s surprising you don’t remember since you produced the Khada Hai song. If we get to watch great cinema without unnecessary cuts and beeps, our movie watching experience would become even better. So let’s hope Mr. Nilhani’s doctor ups his dosage of chill pills, huh?
Bollywood needs to stop being THIS ‘inspired’ by Hollywood
Let’s just stop already, okay? We are trying and failing, and then blatantly lying about trying and failing. There are SO many good stories and such good content that the digital market has seen last year. How about we use this for the big screen too?
That takes us to the next on our wishlist- More short films and web series!
Last year was a success when it came to good short films and web content. From Raakh blowing your mind to Ahalya capturing you with its interesting content, from Permanent Roommates making yet another amazing season to Girl In The City, last year saw some brilliant stuff! Let’s hope for more of these and not ones where the Bahurani wears 10kg of makeup to sleep and Beta Kumar’s sanskaar just bursts your goddamn heart open (and gives you a migraine).
Good content getting its due
Isn’t it high time? Aren’t we old enough? Why is Dishoom on everyone’s mind while Aligarh is completely forgotten? Sure we know how many times Ranveer and Vaani kiss in Befikre, but do we really sit back and talk about the topic that Parched opened up? We have enough masala in Mummy ka Khaana. Let 2017 give good content it’s due!
Stopping the irrelevant objectification of women.
It’s surprising that producers, directors, writers and even actors are okay with objectifying women to ‘sell tickets’. A Recent example being Wajah Tum Ho (You might have to Google this name) where the female lead is taking off her clothes for no reason at all. Oh, she’s portraying a strong level headed lawyer in the movie by the way. Even Befikre for that matter! WHY has ‘modern woman’ become synonymous to ‘likes having a lot of meaningless sex?’ Or OMG! Have you seen Pyaar Manga Hai? The video has awful direction, awful storyline and awful music but 45 million views? Why? Zarine Khan is making out every chance she gets!
No more stupid sex comedies
Have you seen Kya Kool Hai Hum 3? No, seriously! It’s like the first two weren’t enough, the makers decided to choke you with yet another installment. Or Mastizaade for that matter! We expected nothing less from Tusshar Kapoor but VIR DAS? Forget all of this, Great Grand Masti takes the prize when it comes to stupidity. Plus, it has Aftab Shivdasani who talks in that awfully irritating voice with an equally awful expression through the movie!! Bollywood, we can’t ace this genre and especially not with the same actors who play the same roles. We end up making it cheap and the reality is simple – your audience is taking some inspiration from this. Just stop with this okay? Let this one go. Really.
Bollywood not launching not so talented star-kids
We’ve seen quite a bit of this happening over the years and it seems not every star-kid is made for the big screen. Harshwardhan Kapoor debuted with Mirzya after a lot of excitement and it was what we like to call – much ado about nothing. If dashing looks were all that was needed to make it big in the industry, Sonam Kapoor might not just be called a fashionista! Don’t you agree? And Saiyami Kher? Sure she’s the daughter of famous models and looks every bit beautiful but not every pretty face can act! It’s actually a big disappointment that these big names launch in big movies that fail big time and then get big awards at big award shows!
The end of stupid senseless award shows
Has anyone ever said ‘Winner of 2 Filmfare awards’ to describe how good an actor is? No. Because Filmfare gives an award to good looking people only. But this is not a dig at Filmfare, it’s a dig at all the Indian award shows. Why do we give so much importance to how many years someone has been in the industry over performances? Why is it that anytime any Khan is in a movie, he is automatically nominated for the best actor category? At the Color Sansui Stardust Awards, Jacqueline Fernandez was nominated for Best Lead Actor (Female) with no sign of Alia or Sonam in the category! Jacqueline Fernandez everyone. What was she getting nominated for? Shaking her booty the beat of a song? Most of US CAN DO THIS! And how about Disha Patani winning the award for best debut female for her 20 minute role in MS Dhoni? Why not Ritika Singh who was sensational in Saala Khadoos? How are SAME expressions and smile throughout the movie ‘Promising Performance’? It’s time award shows stop with this façade of honoring the best of cinema in 2017 and stick to ‘We just wanted to have a party’.
We must stop ruining classics!
Do we really need to do this? Have you heard Humma Humma from Ok Jaanu? Let’s just resolve not to touch old songs okay? Unless you REALLY know what you are doing! Sure, some songs have worked like ‘Ae Zindagi’ from Dear Zindagi but it’s because the musicians knew the difference between ‘revisiting’ and ‘revamping’.
Fewer breakups and more wedding bells
These go hand in hand. Sure, our favorite celebrities might have a little bit of friction here and there but let’s make it a romantic year! Let’s hope we get to FINALLY see Anushka and Virat tie the knot, Deepika and Ranveer take another step in their relationship and Sonam and her alleged boyfriend celebrate a lifetime of love with an elaborate wedding!
